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Almost
everything at one time or another—heights, social
situations, being left alone, being in a crowd, snakes,
cars, and mice, going outside, staying inside, having hope,
losing hope, working, not working—even, as the old saw goes,
fear itself. Panic attacks are often inspired by the thought
that we might have one.
Things
that retrospectively seem quite small may loom terribly
large when we are frightened of them. Fear is like the
shadows that move across a room at night—in the light of
morning we see it was just a drape or a coat or a branch
blowing in the wind. Until the sun comes up, however, it can
be immobilizing.
When we don’t deal with our fears, they can
completely disrupt our lives as we modify, move around and
manipulate ourselves and everything else to try to avoid
confronting them.
How
Fear Manifests:
Fear is first and foremost experienced in the body—sweaty
hands, dry mouth, upset stomach, heart palpitations, bowel
cramps, muscle tightness, headaches, tunnel vision,
breathing difficulties. The list goes on but essentially
starts in certain portions of the brain and involves
numerous glands, particularly the adrenals.
Everyone is different—not only in what makes
us fearful, but in how that fear manifests in our bodies.
Some people experience a persistent, general state of
fearfulness that wears them over time. Others have specific
fears and/or sudden attacks.
How
Fear Starts:
Fears often follow thoughts —”I’ll never get
that job!” “They’re going to laugh at me when I speak.” “The
bridge is going to fall.” Some of the thoughts that
initiate the chemical cascade of fear are rational, others
are not. Some thoughts lead us to protect ourselves (staying
away from a dark alley), while others make our days
unmanageable (avoiding other people). The first part of
dealing with fears properly is the skillful art of
discernment: Is this fear helpful or hurtful? Is my fear
rational or not? Most people who suffer from persistent
fears know their fears aren’t helpful, but aren’t sure what
to do.
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